We all scream for ice cream

Ice Cream was the star last night. I laid in bed this morning going over the dream, but I may have waited too long to transcribe it. I remember that he and I were together, perhaps in a bar, and he took me home, and I was very excited about the possibilities, and then he told me it was just so I would have a place to sleep, no sex involved. It was sad.

Now I remember, he was an apartment manager, and he took me and someone else up to his apartment. It looked like old lady or old bachelor decor. But he had a big 52" flat screen tv. He said that he had just won another tv, and I said that I was going to need a tv, and I would really like to have one of those. He told me he would sell it to me for $5. I thought about how nice he was to his friends, but disappointed that he just considered me a friend.

bonus

That dream made me remember this one from weeks ago. I was in a house and it was the annual day where they trashed the house. These guys had developed a tradition that on one's birthday, they just trashed the place. They had beer and food, and it was a big party. I walked into the house and they were burning things and taking baseball bats to tile and things. Everyone was having a lot of fun, and no one seemed to be bothered by the destruction. By the end, most of the distinguishing features of the house had been reduced to rubble, and I had a hard time finding a drink amongst the ruin.

delicious

I was talking to a girl, she had a daughter young and had given it to her mom to raise. I worked with her mother, who was rushing around the diner she runs as her daughter was telling me her story. She told me the plan was for her to give up her daughter to her mother, and then move away. She never could do it, though, and now she wanted to keep her daughter, but she didn't think her mother would approve. I tried to convince her that some women come into their maternal instinct later than others.

I moved into another room, an old friend and his friend were there, I had given them shelter. I'm not sure what I was protecting them from, but they were hiding out until the danger had passed. I went to speak to my old friend, who had separated himself from everyone. He had gone to a room full of babies. It was a kind of daycare. I teased him about looking for peace in a room full of crying children. We had a laugh about that. I said goodbye to him. I hugged him, and I knew it was a few moments too long to be polite, but I knew it was the last time I was going to see him.

I was walking out the door, and I say a guy I know from work, and they were talking about how attractive I am. His friend said they my mouth was delectable (or something along those lines.) I was impressed, because he was a baseball team guy (?). I got close to them as I walked out the door, and work guy grabbed me and kissed me firmly on the mouth. He seemed to be convinced by baseball guy's enthusiasm for me.

A dream worth noting

I dreamed of sexy pirate, he was in my class, I wanted his beautiful wavy hair. We were both students. In order to seduce him, I planned to play porn to excite him. He was out of the classroom, so I prepped the video. It was cued, and every time I flipped over to it, I flipped back very quickly, because I was in a room full of people and it was inappropriate. I don’t think that I ever showed it to him.

Somebody's getting married

He was getting married. I was there. They were holding the event at a property my family owned. We kept gravitating towards each other, being in the same place, talking with our heads close together, and his family would come trooping through, or the bride to be (some faceless, bumpy creature) would come in and I’d have to move away. It was a prolonged dance. I believe, in the end, that they ended up getting married despite my urgings to the contrary.

The Big Easy

NOLA gave me the weirdest dreams.

One night, I dreamed that we were all in the quarter (all the women in the bridal party) and we had been hitting bars all night. CC was in her wedding gown, and it was getting crowded, so we were looking for another way to get to a bar all the way down the street. Some guy that worked in the bar showed us the back way, a long, white hallway with wooden floors. We traveled down the hall until we came to a huge open space with golden wood floors and high ceilings. They were doing construction on this, so there was saw dust everywhere and they were using saws and such, but they said we could come through. We went toward the door, and as we went back out into the quarter, I carried CC over the threshold.

The others have escaped me for a moment, but I did have a really interesting dream last night. It seemed to go on forever. Johnny Depp, in full pirate gear

three for one

I was an actor and kept having to run around this corner in heels and sliding in the mud. I thought that they were going to have to get that fixed. As I slid, I dropped my cell phone, which was apparently where I was getting my lines, so I stood up to continue the scene and just adlibbed. I was worried I would throw off the other actor, but she kept going, and in two lines we were where we needed to be.

Family dinner with a bunch of poor relations with a lot of kids.

Dreamt a man with parasomnia was touching me, he was digitally (lol) stimulating me, and I was trying to decide whether I was asleep or awake. I really wanted to be awake. I remember tightening around his fingers, both out of pleasure and to test, and then I ran my hand down his arm just to make sure. Then I woke up for real, and nothing was going on. Sigh.

Dream a Little Dream of Me

Chutah's dream (starring me)

you were in my dreams this morning. we were driving at night. and driving and driving and driving. and i felt at peace.

but then we were at a wedding. it was in a rural area, but with a little building and there was a wooden fence around the parameter of the grounds. we heard gunshots and someone was coming to attack us. i laid down on the ground. it was scary! then i woke up with a migraine.

GS

My dreams have taken on the tone of a two bit peep show recently. Men I know visit me nightly to keep me company while I sleep. This weekend it was sexy prof among others. Last night, grad student was there.

I was in London for something or other. Grad student had moved there with his wife, and while I was there, I thought I’d stop by for a visit. I knew he worked in the architectural district, so I sat on the side of a cobblestone street and watched the people stream out at the end of the workday. He wasn’t coming out, and people were starting to stare and make me generally uncomfortable, so I decided to head to his apartment. I had been there before.

I drove to his apartment, I knew it was apartment 1-A. The apartment I went into was apartment 1-3. The 3 was covered up. I had a laundry basket with me. One of GS’s friends found me and showed me to the right apartment. I was happy to see GS and his wife again. I put down the laundry basket and said something about bringing the clothes for the terrorist organization. We all had a good laugh at that, and GS said he could see that I was up on current events. They had a baby, it was a little girl, she was about 2. I picked her up and she was feeling warm, and I said it seemed that she had a fever, but her parents weren’t sure.

His wife was going to take care of the child, and I was trying to talk GS into taking me out since I was in town. I was hoping to wear him down after a few drinks. I don’t think I got my wish. We ended up in the front yard, and he was reading me some very poetic/dramatic text about advanced schooling. The words and his voice were making me feel rather warm. He began to speak it without the actual text, while he was cutting thorns off of three cacti in the front yard. As he was doing this, he and I both realized it was a foolish and futile effort, but he was determined to cut off these rose-like, thick thorns. I said something about knowing I should have continued grad school, and he said, “You think so?” like he was surprised, like he thought I shouldn’t or couldn’t. I was disappointed. He kept cutting the thorns off the cactus.

Update

It has been a long absence. Beginning therapy has been difficult. I’m somewhat preoccupied with what’s going on in my own mind. I’ve been having lots of dreams; the feelings associated with the dreams last for quite a while. Family and friends are regular parts of the dreams. I thought I’d share one that has stayed with me for a few days.

I was at my house, and I remembered that I left some clothes that I needed out in my car. I was in the middle of changing when I realized this, so I figured since it was night, I could go out to the car and get my stuff without worrying about it. I step out the door, and who should I see in the neighbor’s driveway, right next to my car, but Will Smith (honest to god, Will Smith). Now I’m a little embarrassed, because I’m basically naked, but determined not to wimp out now that he’s seen me. I walk to the car, arms covering myself, get in the car, pick up the laundry basket that I came after, and hold it in front of my breasts. (But since it is a laundry basket with large holes in it, that is not incredibly useful). He was very appreciative of the view. It seems he spoke to me briefly, and I tried to seem casual about the whole thing, and then retreated to the house.

When I remembered this dream, it made me realize that I have lots of dreams where I get into situations and realize, not that I’ve forgotten my shirt, but that I’ve forgotten that it is appropriate or necessary.

Laughter and Tears

I was in a bar. Some restaurant/bar combo like Chili’s. I was meeting Lora Mae there for drinks and karaoke. I was standing at the bar waiting to order a drink. Lora Mae was at the table around the corner. Then Jude Law came by with his friend. I knew his friend, but he was infinitely more attractive than usual, but still not my type. He called out a drink order to the bartender, a shot of something, a beer, and a drink for the bartender. I was standing right in front of him, but he pretended not to notice me, and kept on walking. I couldn’t stop staring, and watched him until he was out of sight. I was crushed that he wouldn’t acknowledge me.

A couple of friends from grad school were interviewing for my company in the break room. I was sitting in on the interviews. One went through the interview, even though he just got through telling me how great his life was in NYC. He was teaching three days a week, and he had time to act. They offered him the job, and he looked at the number and laughed, because he had thought the pay was much higher. It seems like another grad student went through the exact same process as well. Interview, offer (they showed it on a calculator like a car dealership) and then laughter and they left.

Nothing to report

My week has become work too late, get to bed too late, and get out of bed too late. I'm in such a hurry to run out the door, I don't have time to commit my dreams to memory. I may have to give up on the dream blog . . .

Dream Potpourri

I haven't been wanting to post dreams in the last few days. I had one that really pissed me off. I've since forgotten the offending dream, but I do remember who the star was.

Here's a mixture of dreams from this weekend:

Gambling at the state fair with my older sister. She was hitting big on penny machines, I went to join her, but people crowded me out

Planning a partner swap with two other couples; I was a single. I didn't mind. I spoke to parts of the couples who were sitting with me, and they were agreeable, they went to speak to their spouses. I changed into some really sexy panties and went to the pool to await the outcome. I didn't wear a top, and then realized that other people were in the pool. I wasn't too concerned, I figured they would never know. Then Will Smith (swear to God) came over and hugged me, because we were friends, and was surprised, but once I explained the situation understood. I told him I had written out what I wanted to do, and apparently someone's wife was having trouble with the fact that I wanted to lick butter off the back of her knees (IRL: eww, butter)

The HK was supposed to be at work, I saw him rushing around and trying to get ready in a hurry. I asked him if he was late for work, he told me no, and then stopped for a second to tell me he had an appointment with a divorce atty, and I was not expecting it, but not entirely shocked. Some people came over to help me out, he had taken all the money.

An Assortment

Yesterday:

I know I had two dreams, I know one was boring, and did not interest me. The second dream was that I had a young man (not anyone I know) and he was going to be my living toy. He was waiting patiently for me to dominate him, he had brought red restraints. Unfortunately, I either didn’t get to that part, or don’t remember.

Today:

I was teaching English Comp, and it was a big class in a weird, high ceiling room. The class was going well, and then I was told that Sarah Palin was going to come in and teach the class. She was a guest speaker. I sat down in the classroom and rolled my eyes and generally made fun of her, making the students around me laugh. Then I heard a rumor that she was taking my job full time. Meanwhile, she wasn’t teaching English at all, she was giving political stump speeches.

I had another dream later in the morning, it had to do with a terrorist attach (I blame Chutah for telling me about her dream last night). I worked in an airport, and there had been a terrorist attack, and the people that worked there were memorializing it, and they had a wooden bridge with no rails over a stream or something. It seemed important.

Boring

I've had dreams boring enough that I don't care to remember. It seems Sunday's dream was about driving a P.O.S. car and needing to have it fixed. I was working with someone to see if we could make it work. I've got enough of that mundane stuff in my waking life.

Last night I can't remember, but I have that same feeling. Can't remember, don't care too. I'll try to remember and write it down later, even if I'm just folding laundry in my sleep.

Science Sleepaway Camp

I was a scientist in a far away place, with water, and it seems it was cold. I knew the information that the other scientists needed in order to complete the study, I was the key somehow. I was so depressed I couldn't deal with it. I was just sitting around, not doing what I was supposed to be doing, not caring, despite the fact that they needed my help. A man showed up, he was an old friend in the dream, and he picked me up off the ground where I was sitting all curled up, and he told me we were going back to his room, he was going to help me. He started walking, me behind him, and my arms over his shoulders. My sister came in behind and walked with us, and I felt instantly comforted and loved. We went to his room, it had many beds. It had a three or four level waterbed, the top most being so tiny, only a small baby would have fit, three or four bunk beds and full beds. I was looking forward to going to bed with him. My sister had chosen a bed in another room. He kissed me and held me, and I felt really good about it. I was anticipating more. He left the room, and while he was gone, my kids came in, and they needed a place to sleep, and then the other scientists came in, and went to their own beds. The place was full to the rafters, and my plans for the evening were ruined, but I was still hopeful. The housekeeper came in, and the plans were no more. The scientists started to question me on something about evolutionary biology, and I answered the question, but let everyone know that HK had taught me about it. He was instantly surrounded by science guys who wanted to talk to him. Next thing I remember, we were in the same room, lounging after a wedding, all in formal wear, and some kid asked HK if he was a movie star. I looked at him, and he had the chin length sandy blond hair that some starts have now, and was looking elegant in formal wear. I was in formal wear as well, and I looked beautiful, but he was outdoing me. The only other thing I remember is trying to sit on the floor and not ruin my pale pink dress.

Hit and Run

The funny thing is, I had two in my mind when I woke up this morning. I told the oldest, who bounced in to wake me up this morning, starting with the most recent dream, and now that dream is completely gone. Hopefully it was child approved. I think so.

The other dream was that the housekeeper and I were chasing someone. It was a weird kind of thing where it was almost play, but not quite. He was running after this person, and yelled to me to stop them, so I launched this bus that I had. I was really pushing it from behind, but it was really light, and apparently I don’t know my own strength, because I pushed it too hard and at the wrong angle, so it ended up going across the street into a store instead of down the street at whomever we were chasing. Instead of completely obliterating this little store, it knocked out this little front window and this small back window. Both of them were unusual shapes. We ran away, going back home, which was right across the street. We were debating what we should do, and I wanted to leave a note with insurance information so they could file against us. The housekeeper thought we were home free and we should just act like we didn’t know what happened. We both agreed that we should take some plastic sheeting and cover the windows (I was unsure whether to cover the inside or outside, but he said outside) by taping it to the outside with duct tape.

I had decided to give them our insurance information and have them file a claim, despite the rise in our premiums. There were only two small windows to be fixed, so it shouldn’t be a big deal. The HK said that unusual size windows were really expensive to replace, something like hundreds per square inch. I went online to look it up, and discovered that the store was a specialty comic shop, and it had two limited edition custom designed comic inspired stained glass windows. They were numbered and everything. I asked the HK if he found any colored glass while cleaning the glass up in the store (we’re conscientious even during a hit and run.) He said he didn’t find any, so I was relieved, and discovered that the windows were designed, but not built, or something like that.

I went over to cover the windows, had decided to file the claim. We had to cover the windows, because a huge storm was coming, and we didn’t want them to have more damage to the store.

I asked the oldest, apparently the second dream was that I was painting a mirror on the wall, but once I was finished the youngest told me it wasn't right, so I repainted it. I woke up stating that the youngest was right.

Vague

The last two days have been really vague dreams. I wake up, and I don’t remember anything but that I’ve been teaching in my dreams, and there are a few faces of people involved. But, due to late nights, I’m oversleeping and rushing in the morning, and unless I spend a few minutes when I wake up just thinking about the dreams, they fade very quickly. I will strive to do better.

Class

I was in graduate school, but it was actually in a chapel. It was in a sort of pastoral, country setting. We had big, stained glass windows, and I was sitting in a pew on the back row. There were desks of a sort as well. I was preparing to teach, I had to teach in 1-2 hours. My dad came into the building, he had been out fishing in the area. He looked all scraggly and tanned and happy, like when I was a kid. He asked me if I’d like to go to breakfast with him and his friends. I was really happy to see him, and wanted to go hang out. I snuck out of class, so that I could have a little more time and still make it back in time for class. We went to a little diner in town, and we were having a great time. By this time, my sisters had joined us, and I kept reminding them to help me keep track of time. Before long, I looked up at the clock, and it was around 11:20. My class had started at 11. I was mad at my family for not helping me to remember, and when I said something, they said they did it purposefully, because they wanted me to keep enjoying myself. I ran out of the restaurant, back towards the school, but I knew it was in vain, because it was long past the mythical ten minute rule.

Porntastic

I got lazy this weekend, so I didn’t write my dreams down. But I did commit them to memory so that I could post them later. This weekend was like late night Cinemax, only more explicit.

Saturday:

I was a Japanese woman, and I had rented myself a Japanese man. I was at some kind of RV show, looking to purchase an RV. I was in some stands like at an athletic field, silver aluminum risers, and they were mostly empty; just a few old men in the stands. I had the Japanese stud perform his duties at the top of the stands, by the announcer’s box. He was a little afraid of discover, but being the hired help, he didn’t have much say in the matter. My hands were against the box, I was bent over, and it was hot.

Sunday:

I was surfing porn on the internet, and the categories had gotten ridiculously specific. I clicked on one, it was labeled “high moms.” The loading graphic was a black and white animation of the style of a traffic sign of a woman giving head. When the movie loaded, it was of man with two women (presumably high moms). It was in a gym setting, and the man was standing, with one woman in front of him, bent over in half. The second woman climbed up on the man’s shoulders, facing him, and well, suffice it to say, they did some raunchy things, most of which were sexy, some of which were physically impossible. I had to spend some time with Smurfy after that one.

Monday:

Less porntastic and much more creepy. I went to this lady’s house to lift weights with her. She was rich, and she didn’t have to work. Around the walls of the gym were pictures of her from her beauty queen days. She was a beauty queen in the eighties. She still looked the same. She wore the eighties work out clothes, had the same hair and make up, it was creepy. I was lifting weights, and her nephew came in. Her nephew had downs. He was grown. I don’t know if she told me, or I saw something, but somehow I knew that she wanted to do very inappropriate things with him. I left shortly afterword, and was riding in a car with my mom and sister, and they asked what was wrong, and I went into this lengthy description of how pathetic this woman was and how I was morally conflicted about her designs on her nephew, because while she was a sick puppy, she hadn’t done anything. I didn’t know if I should tell his mother. My mom said I should.

Bubbles and Music

We were in some kind of store, I believe it was CC and I, or my sister and I, were found this bubble solution that you could swallow, and when you breathed out, bubbles streamed from your mouth. Tons and tons of bubbles. We breathed bubbles all over the store, and then when we ran out of bubbles, we went to drink more, and we couldn’t find any. We were trying to explain it to one of our friends, and we raced around the store looking for more bubbles, laughing as we searched.


I went to the gym, and as I was driving into the parking lot (I believe in that first car again), a guy in a dark suit with dark sunglasses stopped me, and told me that I had to turn my music way down because the owner of the building hated loud music in the parking lot. I turned it down, but the person behind me came into the parking lot with music blaring, and the man in the dark suit went to bother him.

I had a dream about hot professor too, and acting class, but that one is all hazy.

Busted

Sorry, let life get the better of me. All I remember from last night’s dream is being at work, walking away from my computer for at least twenty minutes, and returning to find that not only did I not lock it, but I also left the chat window up. Way to go.

I remembered

I was in a trailer house we used to own, except it was all kinds of aquas and pinks and bold colors. The people who lived there were moving out/moving in(?), and while I was looking around (I guess I was the landlord) I realized that we didn’t completely move out when we left, so our stuff was in there, plus a bunch of our trash. I was trying to tidy up some of the stuff we left. When I left the house, I drove off in my first car, and there was a big gate like on rural places with cattle, and I didn’t or couldn’t get out to shut the gate, and I called someone at the front of the trailer park to come through and shut the gate for me. Not an earth-shattering dream by any means.

The overeducated hippo that thinks he's better than you

Yesterday’s dream:
We were at the zoo with the kids, and a friend from work decided that it would be a great idea to swim with her daughter in the hippo tank. She was having a great time, until the zoo keepers were telling her to get out of the tank, and she was pretending that her daughter fell in and she was trying to rescue her, but it was taking a long time. She didn’t care that they wanted her out or that it was an incredibly dangerous thing to do.

Today’s dream:
Can’t remember. Waited too long.

Wrong place, wrong time

I was in a store with two girls, it was the goth store. They were all wrapped up in the little goth trinkets, and I was standing back, watching them shop. I felt someone place a kiss on my neck from behind, and they had really full lips, and kissed several more times. I turned around to find a sexy man behind me, he kissed me, and I kissed him back. I was aware that the girls were not too far away, and told him I couldn't. He suggested we go to the dressing room, which was just a little room, with a cloth curtain. We went into the dressing room, he pressed me up against the wall and kissed me deeply, and we ran our hands over each other's bodies while we kissed. It was all very erotic, but I was worried that the girls would start looking for me or that we would be discovered in the dressing room. I remember saying that I didn't want to be banned for life from the goth store. Reluctantly, I pulled away from him, and returned to the girls, who hadn't noticed my absence, and he left.

Voting

The new medication makes it harder for me to remember my dreams.

I was in an antiques store, and I had my niece with me. Someone was talking to me, and I looked across the room and saw these really interesting little glass figurines. They looked kind of like kewpie dolls, but were different enough that I thought they were a real find. Chutah came into the room, and I pointed them out to her, because I thought of her immediately when I saw them. She was really excited about the pseudo kewpies.

****

Something about voting and politics, I can't remember.

IRILL

I was chatting with CC online. She said that now that people's wishes were coming true, it was time to start getting lists together. She changed her name on the chat to IRILL, or something like that to reflect that she was in list-making, wish-getting mode.

Can't sleep

Conserve Water, Shower together

I was going to the pshychologist, and trying to remember who my dr. was by going through some kind of greatest hits collection. I knew it was a guy, and he was one of my favorites. I thought it was Beck. My dad was going to take me, but first he went around getting bags of ice. I don't know why. When he came back, he was Christopher Walken. I went to the doctor, but the visit was incredibly brief, I filled out one form and Walken complained about how they were mistreating me, but it wasn't about a treatment, it was a job.

I went to my hotel room, to get ready for a big event, and my girlfriend came with me, we were talking about what had happened, and I told her that I had to go take a shower, I'd come right back. I left the room, and came back in for something, and she looked disappointed, so I asked her if she wanted to come with me. She was very happy with that idea. We grabbed our robes, and headed for the hotel showers. The showers were in this huge room, it was bigger than my house by far, with about 30 ft ceilings, and completely tiled in brown tiles about 2' x 2'. She started to disrobe, and I liked what I saw. She would lose an item of clothing, then I would. We were all stripped down except for our shirts, and I remember feeling vaguely self conscious, but not terribly so. For some reason, she didn't like her breasts. I went ahead and took off my shirt, and she was impressed, and told me I was beautiful. Another one of our friends came in, but we didn't mind, because the sexual tension was there but not overwhelming. We hurried down to the showers, with were recessed into huge floor to ceiling windows, three spouts to a section. I went to step down into the beginning of the shower area.

I was in water that was over my head, still trying to swim to the water. I remembered that I forgot my shampoo, but there was lots of it floating around. Speaking of floating, I was floating on the top of the water with no effort. I explained this to my friend, who thought it was completely normal, so I relaxed. We went to one side of the room, there was this giant staircase covered in water, and we swam up the stairs, and when we reached the top, we realized that the way down was through the dining room. The stairs were a visual focus in the dining room, and people would swim/slide through. I thought briefly about my nakedness, and didn't want certain people to know about my Sapphic adventures, but wasn't that concerned. I wasn't afraid. We decided to play for a while.

****
Something weird about a grandfather who was a carnival act, and he took me to meet some of his carnie friends. We walk in the door, and the friend is a man the size of a Barbie, that my relative used to launch into the air, and now he and his wife came over to take care of them sometimes, because they couldn't take care of myself. They were called Copper babies, for some reason having to do with the powder form of copper. Today, the little man had a splinter in his behind that the grandmother had to remove.

Family Style

I was with my family (my mom, dad, and sisters and my family). We had just driven home, I had driven myself, I was in my first car, that was super fast. My famliy was teasing me about driving super fast on the way home, but I was happy to be driving my car. We brought groceries inside; we had just come from somewhere with lots of marble that was very official (or the airport?) and we were going to make a big dinner for everyone. I had bought the groceries, and I had overbought (as usual.) My sister was talking about breastfeeding, and how she kept trying to breastfeed, but couldn't at five in the evening. My mom and I suggest that she change that feeding time. Then, I went outside, and it was my sister's house, and she had lettering on the outside, and I wanted to change it, but all I remember is part of what I wanted it to say: "Remember . . . like that house down the street that has the loud bass." as in the sound, not the fish. It was too long, so I had to settle on "Please Remember." What exactly, I don't know, I imagine it was the loud house or something.

Forced Entry

I was walking with my Dad and sister across a field of grass, I was all dressed up. We were going to meet my betrothed, and I was going to stay with him from now on. Then, either Jim Carrey or John Malkovich strolled up, and tried to steal me away. It wasn't scary, more like cute or amusing, and he was not successful, and I liked him, but didn't run away with him or anything. In a weird way, it was nice to feel wanted.

Another dream, I was in the bathroom stall at a university, and there was a cleaning lady in the next stall, a young man (just barely eighteen) burst into the bathroom, and busted open the door and raped the cleaning woman, except for she never complained or asked him to stop, and I don't think she ever stopped cleaning. The whole thing lasted like thirty seconds. He apologized to her, and she told him how most women didn't understand that they didn't or shouldn't make a big deal of it, it changes the dynamics of the situation, if you just accept it, it's okay, because men just need sex, and do stupid things if deprived. They were out of the stall by now, and I was completely horrified by the events and the conversation. I came out of my stall, and challenged that point, saying that most rape is about power, not sexual need. She somewhat agreed.

I was reading a feminist book last night. That's the only way I can explain the dreams. As a woman, I'm embarrassed to be having dreams where a woman is making a case that rape victims are not victims at all. Ashamed is probably more accurate.

busy night

There's a bunch today, so I'm just going to do these in no particular order:

Watching TV at my mom's house, some school friends were there. My mom was sitting with us, and whatever we were watching was turned into a Disney film, and my mom was really interested in that. My friend was playing with a calculator, and he handed it to me, and on the calculator he had typed, something like: "I have had 10 English classes, and out of those, 5 of the instructors were beautiful. You were one of those. " I was flattered. I spent the rest of the dream trying to pick the right shirt to wear, spent some time without one.

My child was going to a neighbor's house to be babysat, it was a shaky arrangement, and we were starting to discuss it, but it started raining, so we headed to my house to talk and she was telling me I should take her to a reading class at the library on Friday mornings because she was ready to learn to read.

I was in the bathtub with the husband and my youngest. We were all just chillin in the tub, until I was inspired, and I touched him under the water. We set the little one out of the tub, and told her to go get dressed, and then I stroked him, to the point I was about to explode. I don't know about him. I climbed on top of him, and was having an orgasm almost immediately, and I remember how tight my body was clenched, and the tightness brought him to orgasm too. I was apologetic afterward, because I had gone stampeding for the penis instead of giving him a kiss. What's wrong with a kiss. (lol) But I honestly felt pretty bad and like I had been thoughtless. It seems like he agreed with me.

Something about a group of attractive men I went to college with. I don't think it was sexual, who knows?

I give up, there were at least two more, one involving a huge bubble bath (that was popular last night) and another one that seems to be pretty complicated.

?

I dreamed, and then I slept some more, and now I've got no clue what I dreamed. If I remember later, I'll come back.

DUI

A guy from work had asked me to come out for a drink; something had happened, and he was not happy, so I went. I had a few drinks, I should have stopped drinking, but I didn't want to leave him because he was so sad. At this point, the sexual attraction that we had been trying to ignore started to rise. Since this was a bad idea, I made my goodbyes. He walked me out of the bar, the tension was thick, I could tell he wanted me, and I wanted him, but I couldn't have him. He told me to be careful, and gave me some advice on how not to get picked up by the cops. I was pretty drunk at this point, and had just drank a few more drinks quickly, so I knew it was going to bad soon. I remember sitting in the car, and it was really humid out, there was a sprinkling of water all over the car. I think I ended up sleeping in the car.

Something about waking up, my friend from work was there. She was working at some kind of rehab center, and I think I was there as a result of the previous night's binge. She assumed I was working there, and was showing me the ropes. It seems like we were cleaning the people's bathrooms, there was something about the showers.

It seems I also met her daughter, and had a brief conversation with her husband when they came to pick her up.

School Daze

I had a dream I didn't like, and don't really want to talk about, really just because it was boring. I was on some kind of work retreat/trip with all my coworkers, and my boss was driving us around in a big yellow bus, and she was very excited about it. I was helping her keep her baby and baby gear together.

Then I dreamed I was in the library, got a couple of books and went down to get a coffee. The ladies there didn't know how to make it, so I was trying to tell them, and they ended up making it in a milk carton, but I told them that was ok. I saw a guy outside that I went to school with, and had always been interested in (as a person, not as a love interest) and he asked me if I wanted to go to the library with him before the track meet. I said yes, and admitted I had just been, but wouldn't mind going again. So I went back to my room and changed for the track meet, which somehow included formal wear. I went to the library, since I figured we were meeting there. I didn't see him; I looked around for a while, but he wasn't there. I knew the track meet was starting soon and was trying to find out when the track meet started. I decided to go back to the dorms, and see if I could find someone. I walked into the hall, and this guy was standing there, dressed in formal wear (and possibly a kilt) and standing with a friend and girlfriend. I asked when the track meet started, and they said they were about to leave, the guy was speaking at the opening ceremonies (which explains the clothes). I said something about being at the library, and the guy was sorry for not coming, but not overly worried about it. I can remember squatting down to talk to him, I guess he was either kneeling or tiny, and I remember his girlfriend looming over me in a while sheath-style evening gown.

Something about an bad, bad woman from Harry Potter (I knew her IRL, but can't remember now) and she really wanted these little glowing, flying creatures to do her bidding. Harry had the creatures in a mason jar. We were in her class. She couldn't take them from him directly, because that would look bad, but our class was in the clouds. So she grabbed the jar from him and threw it down to earth. The jar busted, and she sent some people down to try and gather the sparklies. Harry and I went down to try and stop them, but we were too late. There were just a few left. We were trying to pick up the few remaining ones, they looked like bivalves that emitted a blue light, but catching them was like trying to pick a lightning bug off of a blade of grass amongst other blades of grass. To complicate things, there was broken glass everywhere, and I kept trying to reach these others, and cutting myself in the process.

The Play's the Thing

I dreamed that I was sitting talking to sexy college professor, and we were doing a show together. It was a musical, and I wish I could remember which one, because I'm sure it would be funny. Anyway, he was in the show, and I was working backstage as usual. It came time for call, which was thirty minutes before the performance, and then professor becomes a housekeeper, panicking because he was supposed to make the dinner for the cast, and now there is no time, there is only time for him to get to the theatre. I convince him that we can pick something up, it will be ok. We get to the theatre and everyone is warming up.

I was looking at buying a car. It was like my first car. I was either buying it or selling it, I'm not sure. I remember being drawn to it, remembering how good my first car ran, and how it had a lot of miles on it. I drove the car, it ran great. (It might have belonged to my sister)

Someone was trying to tell me that mowing lawns at a university was a great gig for me. All I had to do was show up, mow one area a day, five days a week, and they would pay me $50 a night. There was a Mexican guy there telling me all about it too.

That's all I remember today, but it was pretty good, considering I keep waking up at night. Maybe I can nap on my keyboard today.

So easy . . .

I remember basically flashes of dreams today.

1. LoraMae and I in a liquor store, me trying to decide what to get, and there was this Italian tequila for 99 cents. We were very confused by this, plus it came in really weird flavors. Candy flavors. No wonder I was having trouble deciding.

2. High School Dream where I finally go back to see all the high school people again, and one person welcomes me and tells me how happy everyone will be to see me. Most of the guys are on the basketball court, and once the game is over, we line up against the wall under the goal to greet them. Kinda a high five line, and nobody pays any attention to me. I was disappointed but not surprised.

3. I bought some really fancy, colorful fish, and I was showing them to someone, and then left them out on the floor. In dreamworld, this was not going to kill them. I left the room, thinking everything would be fine, and when I came back, these kittens that I had, that I thought were accounted for, had slaughtered them all. But had not eaten them.

4. Me and the kids were cavepeople, yet we lived at my dad's house with the housekeeper. We went out on a hunter/gatherer mission, and were kidnapped by my neighbor, who also took our kill. I think it was a deer. The guy let me go after he stole my deer, and I walked home (the kids I think were still inside, but I wasn't concerned about it) and told the housekeeper what happened, and he said he should go with us on the hunt, and maybe he could lecture us about dinosaurs while we hunted.

I'm tired today.

Waiting for Godot

I don't remember much of my dreams today, they might become more clear later, it happens that way sometimes.

1. I was at my dad's house, but can't remember why. My older sister kept calling to find out if I'd received my birthday present in the mail. I kept telling her it wasn't there yet, but she made me check the mailbox again anyway.

2. I was in the living room, playing with my blue friend Smurfilicious (also known as O'Goddagain) and the kids started to wake up and they turned on cartoons, and I kept thinking that if I was suave I could pull it off, so I kept trying to make it work, but they kept talking to me, so I finally gave up. Eldest was wanting me to look at birthday presents Youngest had received in the mail. She showed me a gift, and then took me to a toy shelf in the back of the room, saying that these were all Youngest's toys, that she had gotten them for birthday gifts, and I had to remind her that that was our stock for the store, not presents for Youngest. I had stashed my blue friend on a box in the top shelf, and of course, Eldest went straight for the box, so I had to grab Smurfilicious and hide him.

I'm starting to question whether this is wise

**redacted**

I dreamed that I was at this place where you dig through loose rock to find artifact-like things, and I found these glass figures. Fat, with little definition. There were frogs, and babushka things. I kept them. Then I was comparing what I got with my sister, I believe the older one and someone else was entering them into a big computer. I was feeling pretty good about what I found until I realized that it was a calorie counter, and my figures were actually very large (larger than a fist) sized hard candies. I ended up with 2001 calories flashing up on the screen in huge letters, and pissed because it was just breakfast time, plus I hadn't eaten them because I thought they were glass.

Trapped in the Internet

I was at work, but it was a department store. I had been telling friend how much I like lemon water, and she was raving about it as well. It was closing time and the women that I worked with were showing me how to turn off the lights in my area. It was a make-up counter. We turned the lights out, then they told us we had a meeting.

We go to the meeting, and it was really boring. Nobody was paying attention, it was how to fill out some form or something, and the presenter was really quiet. The warehouse guys from The Office were there, drinking beer, and being rowdy, until some lady threw them out and we continued. LoraMae was there with me, and after we got completely bored with the forms, we started working on getting pictures of ourselves ready for a web page. We needed help, so we started emailing IT to help us out.

Next thing I remember, I was at home, and I was looking at the internet. I was looking at pictures of myself on the IT guy's professional web page, which he had put there at my request, so I could use them for whatever LoraMae and I were working on. They were mostly pictures from my teenage years, with one childhood picture (that he had shopped to be on the face of a pumpkin). My son came in while I was looking at these pictures, so he started looking at them. He started wandering around the site, and it had a feature/game where you played a fly that flew around in an environment, which looked like a 3D Dali painting.

He landed on a pig, on it's side, floating in the sky, as he moved counterclockwise, the pig rolled. He took off, and he was falling fast. At the bottom was the ocean, and he started frantically flapping his wings, and he pulled up at the last minute. There was even little circles on the water like when a helicopter hovers.

I convinced him to get off of the site, because the housekeeper was home, and I didn't want him to know where I'd been. He saw the pictures, and wondered how they got there, and I remember telling him they were put there by LoraMae or Chutah's friend at our request. I shut it down and went outside to get some stuff out of my car. He came out after a moment, very angry, and I thought I was busted. He asked me some leading question, but I was smarter than to answer that. I waited it out, and then he said that he thought I was putting my picture out on movie industry web pages so I would become a movie star and run away. I didn't know how to convince him that wasn't the case.

White and Nerdy

I just remembered snippets when I woke up this morning, not a full dream. The first one I remember is being camping with my family, and my sister-in-law had rented this pimped out van, and I was chilling in the van instead of roughing it, surfing for porn on the internet. I was either trying to convince Cotton Candy to watch with me, or she was watching with me.

Next little bit was I was a guy, and I was looking for sweet stereo equipment. Serious stereo equipment.

Just before I woke up, I dreamed I was a gangsta rapper rolling around in a black SUV with very fancy rims. (Damn you, Boondocks)

For some reason, I had the song "White and Nerdy" stuck in my head all morning.

08.14 Taken down by the FBI

I remember that I was going to meet an ex-boyfriend. We were going to meet on a college campus. I brought my sister with me, she was just coming to campus, and then after I met with him, we were going to see and orchestra play pop music. I remember being on campus, it was mostly grays and stone, and I was going to call him and let him know I was there, but he came up to me right then. I was very excited and nervous to see him. We set out on our date, and somehow, instead of seeing the orchestra, we ended up in a big yellow school bus. No kids in the bus, just an empty school bus. He was driving, and had a destination in mind. We were stopped at a light and the power went out for the entire block, so traffic was stopped by police while crews worked to get the power restored. One of the power company employees was super huge, and kept fooling around and hiding behind buildings and stuff, so we knew they were just about done. Instead of waiting like a good boy, ex-boyfriend took off, and we drove away to our destination. It turned out to be someone’s house, or a mansion of some kind, and I knew we were about to get in trouble, not only for breaking and entering, but also because he took a big yellow school bus across a blockade, so they probably thought he was a terrorist. I was upstairs in the bathroom when the FBI came in and arrested him downstairs. I needed to pee really badly, so I decided I’d better pee before I got arrested, because who knew when I’d get the chance after that. I went, and then, as I was struggling to pull my pants up, I could hear the FBI running up the stairs. It didn’t help the struggle any. . . .

Welcome to my subconscious

I've been very interested in the strange dreams that I've been having recently. I've always remembered a lot of my dreams, but they've seemed to get clearer and stranger recently. So here goes. I'll try to post a dream every day, and everyone is welcome to comment, interpret, or share their own dreams.